Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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