About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Did I show you my penis last night?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
