you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
