why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
