Too much gin, very little bucket
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
