what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i think i have two assholes
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
