xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
