belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
