yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
