youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I am available for nakedness
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
