theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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