Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
