Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
