In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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