Farmville is her only friend.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
