I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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