You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize