why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize