Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
