When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
