I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
