I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
