You really coming over, don't trick.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
ugly people sure do ruin things
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
