Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
