no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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