But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
