Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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