I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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