if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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