We're like a lot better than the average bears
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We're too hungover to prance.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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