i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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