absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
it's like iHOP with fire
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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