And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
