The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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