I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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