Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize