bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
