I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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