She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
My hand turned me down
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize