I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
