My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
