I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
