Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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