we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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