Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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