did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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