Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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