she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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