Whatcha textin bout Willis?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize