But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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