chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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